No permission

Reprinted without permission:

Besides this type  of Sex Ed in schools (this is referring to birth control – gasp!)), they also teach here that there are 6 types of sexual orientations. Some teachers even describe them in detail to our 15, 16 and 17 year olds. And yet, what are the real stats?

A recent research synthesis by Gary Gates of the Williams Institute, a think tank at UCLA Law School dedicated to sexual-orientation law and public policy, suggests that among adults in the United States, Canada, and Europe, 1.8 percent are bisexual men and women, 1.1 percent are gay men, and 0.6 percent are lesbians. 

These stats are extremely low. So why are we teaching the kids that these are acceptable and desirable lifestyles? Why do they even get “air play”, so to speak?

These are the reasons that I am agaisnt sex ed in schools. It needs to happen in the home and we should be teaching our children about abstinence. Not only because of the problems with unwanted pregnancies, but because of the emotional scarring as well. The Sex Ed teachers don’t talk about the bonding that happens when people have sex, and how it is so difficult, particularly for women, to break up. Women who have one or more partners before marriage have a lot more issues with trust, deep love etc because they have experienced abandonment and pain already.

Also, girls have spoken up and said that the sex ed classes seem to give guys a Green Light to ask for sex, and get sex. I have read testimonials saying that the classes just lead to sex abuse of women, because there is so much peer pressure to give in to the demands for sex. They are made to feel that this is expected of them, even when they don’t want to do it. If the girls were polled, many would say that they wish abstinence was taught in the schools so they had more weight behind their NO’s to sexual innuendo and invitation. We need to be protecting our daughters, not telling our sons it is okay to have sex with girls in highschool!

We live in a world that idolizes living for the moment, fun, lust and pleasure. We have not been teaching our children about consequence, about commitment and about real love. They are the losers. Abortion clinics grow. Marriages flounder.

There seems to be so little hope for the world,and for our children. I pray for my children every day, sometimes many times, for their safety and their futures. My husband and I have had open conversations with them about sex, about the gay lifestyle, and about God’s plan for their lives.

If all the parents who really believed this DID this, and stood up against what is happening, maybe we could turn things around. I don’t know. But meanwhile, teens continue to have sex and to abort many unwanted children. It makes me so sad.

Since this person, that I have never spoken to one-on-one before, is approaching me and opening up a dialogue, I feel like she wants a discussion.  I could be wrong; she could just want someone to preach to and is now becoming aware that I may not share her prejudiced and ignorant assumptions.

However, I do not want to right her without putting thought into it first.  And, that thought needs to be directed at my homework right now.

I’m guessing this is not the time to say that I identify as bisexual.  🙂  (And by that I mean that I am not one of the 10%, as estimated by Kinsey, that is exclusively heterosexual.)

She does touch on girls feeling pressured to say yes and that their no’s aren’t taken seriously.  I am also concerned with this but see it as a biproduct of rape culture that fetishizing virginity supports.

11 thoughts on “No permission

  1. The Wise Fool says:

    Yuck, there is so much wrong there that I don’t even know where to start. I feel sorry for her lack of compassion and understanding.

  2. Heather says:

    Wow. Just wow. Also, it is clear to me that she has never examined the curriculum from a sex ed class. Admittedly, I have only been through the curricula of one school district, but it was nothing like she described. Also, one thing I have never understood…In general, do people on her side of the debate think that abstinence was never discussed in non-anstinence only (what a mouthful!) sex-ed classes? Most people I know, including myself, who didn’t go through abstinence only programs definitely still got exposed to abstinence. In the classes I took in high school and in college, abstinence was hammered as the only 100% sure way not to get pregnant or an std. We were made very a ware of the failure rates of various kinds of birth control. We were also given very clinical instructions on how to use them. Much time was spent telling both genders about their rights to say no (admittedly, this was empohasised mor for girls than boys.) The general message was “Ignorance is dangerous. Immaturity is dangerous. We’ve fixed the first one.”

    Aaaaaaaagh there is so much misinformation in the world!

  3. That could have been written by most “Christian” parents and reflects what they are TOLD is taught in sex-ed classes and their abysmal ignorance of what is actually taught. Sex-Ed doesn’t “encourage” anything, it merely informs and educates.

    Teenagers didn’t start having sex after sex-ed classes were created. Abortion clinics are a result of lack of information, not too much information.

    Don’t get too excited about Kinsey’s 10% or Gates 3 or 4%. I don’t trust either set of numbers, especially Kinsey’s as I understand the survey was skewed by choice of sample. And even if Gates is right, they are still human beings and entitled to live their lives and we need to understand and accept that. And especially if Gates is right, then what is all the fuss about non-straight orientations?

  4. The bottom line is she’s bought into the lie that knowledge is dangerous, when in truth it’s empowering. It’s especially sad that she’s a woman, yet she apparently thinks women who “know too much” are vulnerable to making unwise decisions.

  5. Quince says:

    I agree with Heather, this person has NO IDEA about the sex ed curriculum taught in schools. Her naivete is a waste of everyone’s time.

  6. Skjaere says:

    If this woman is worried about girls’ “no’s” getting taken seriously, she needs to realise that one of the reasons for this is that, when we teach kids that girls are supposed to say “no”, even when they maybe kind of want to say “yes”, but they’re worried about seeming “slutty”, guys will keep pushing their luck. If girls are taught to say “no” only when they mean “no”, maybe that “no” would carry more weight.

    The Sex Ed teachers don’t talk about the bonding that happens when people have sex, and how it is so difficult, particularly for women, to break up. Women who have one or more partners before marriage have a lot more issues with trust, deep love etc because they have experienced abandonment and pain already.

    Oh, good crikey, I hate this one! My mother used this one on me, *and I believed her* for the longest time, because I was young and I didn’t know any better. She told me that a woman who breaks up with a man she’s had sex with experiences an emotional trauma similar to that of a young child losing a parent. It’s an effective scare tactic, but anyone who’s actually had more than one sex partner knows that it just isn’t true. Hell, most of the guys I’ve been with were more upset by our breakups than I was. Heartbreak is about losing an emotional connection, not a genital one.

    • Ahab says:

      “She told me that a woman who breaks up with a man she’s had sex with experiences an emotional trauma …”

      Skjaere — Unfortunately, this tactic is still used by pro-abstinence groups such as Silver Ring Thing. Ugh.

  7. D'Ma says:

    I agree with others here who say she has NO idea what is actually taught in sex-ed classes. If she did she’d know that they indeed DO empower a male or female to say no. They educate all about the ugliness that is an STD complete with pictures to show what happens to you if you get one. That who empowerment to say “no” would come from her as a parent teaching her children (male or female) that they are the ones who have control over their own bodies and that no one has the right to guilt them or manipulate them into anything (sex or otherwise).

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