But the prince wants to

Marriage and weddings seem to be a constant theme for Lil’T.  She was playing marriage yesterday and looked a little sad.

“What are you doing?” I asked.

“Getting married,” she sighed.

“Do you want to get married?” I queried.

“No, but the prince really wants to.”

Where did that come from?

“Honey, you don’t have to get married if you don’t want to.  And you don’t have to stay married if you don’t want to.  A marriage needs two people.”  I tried to explain.

“But, but the prince really really really wants to get married, so how can he get married if I don’t marry him?”

“No, darling, that is the point!  No one can marry you if you don’t want to.  He can marry someone else who wants to and if no one wants to, then too bad.  Being married isn’t a need.  There are lots of amazing people who never get married.”  I say.

Later on, she watches me hug her daddy.  Seizing a teachable moment, I say, “See, both your dad and I wanted to marry each other. ”  (aww, we’re so cute)

Still, this does bother me.  My 4 year old thinks that if a prince wants something from her, she must give it because he is a prince and he wants it?   I hope that changes.

But it is human nature to want to give to someone what they want.  Well, maybe not for everyone.  The balance between helping other people and helping yourself can be tricky.  Some people grow up with the idea that they exist to help other people.  Some people have the idea that others exist to help them.

I hope her prince (or princess) isn’t one of them.

3 thoughts on “But the prince wants to

  1. D'Ma says:

    I love that you’re teaching your daughter to be independent. Maybe she’ll want to get married, maybe she won’t, but you will have empowered her with the ability and confidence to make her own decision about that.

  2. Donna Banta says:

    Good going Prairie Nymph! You’re setting Lil’T on the right track.

  3. ... Zoe ~ says:

    What D’Ma and Donna said. 🙂

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s