Grandma had a stroke

My grandmother had a stroke on Sunday.  I’ve spent a lot of time at the hospital.

In a way, it is almost nice to see her needing help.  My grandmother has been more of a mythical figure than a grandmother.  She complained last year (at age 78) that she could only put in 6 or 8 hours of work a day, instead of 16 like she hoped.  And by work, this woman raised in the 30s who was doing manual labour in the fields before she was old enough to go to school, she meant work.

She raised 8 kids of her own and many others.  She worked the fields, and the dairy barn, raised turkeys and other fowl, and up to this year has maintained a garden and orchard big enough to get all the workers on the farm through the winter. 

When she spoke, it was to echo whatever Faux News was ranting about.  Or to tell everyone to let her do the dishes.  I didn’t have the gift of drawing out her deeper side.

Now, I see her eyes full of the tenderness that she reserves for babies and other helpless animals.  Its kinda nice.

She says “thank-you’ now.  I don’t know if I have ever heard her use that word.  It was always, “You shouldn’t do that.  You keep it.  I’ll do that.”

It is hard to see this woman defined by her superhuman work ethic unable to get out of bed.  Her sharp mind, especially good with numbers, now unsure of her name at times.  The uncertainty of whether she’ll improve or take a turn for the worse is frustrating.  Seeing fear and confusion instead of determination and stubborness isn’t easy.

But, I like that she is letting others help her.  She is affectionate and carresses peoples’ hands.  She smiles.  She doesn’t say a word about immigrants or government. 

And I feel kinda guilty for enjoying that.

6 thoughts on “Grandma had a stroke

  1. I’m kind of out of the loop and late with saying I am sorry to hear about your grandmother. She is a tough old bird and if sheer will power can pull her through, she will come out of this. Love and hugs.

  2. ... Zoe ~ says:

    Gentle hugs and warm thoughts sent your way.

  3. D'Ma says:

    (((Hugs))) and well wishes. I’m sorry about your grandmother and I’m sorry that it took something like this for you to experience her gentler side. Chin up!

  4. Lorena says:

    Sorry to hear about your Meemaw. I hope she recovers . I didn’t know you were going through this. Having relatives around can’t be easy. Good luck with that.

    • prairienymph says:

      I feel kinda bad, but I don’t know if I hope she recovers.
      The stroke has damaged a lot of her brain and she is having major heart and lung problems as well. I don’t really have much hope that she can recover from that. Maybe things will stabilize, though.
      She is trying to pull all of the tubes out of her body because she has to do chores. “I have to go work” was the only clear sentence she’s said so far, as she doesn’t always know her name.
      I’m worried that if she does recover enough to go to a care home, she’ll always be escaping to go to work, or she’ll get depressed.

      • I’m with you. Full recovery or no recovery. Brain injuries of any kind are terrible to live with afterwards. Your other Grandma went easy. She could have lived “another 10 years” but who knows what the circumstances would have been. Love and hugs

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