Taking up Space

We just arrived back in the city from two weeks of roaming the prairies.

I had forgotten the space in the open fields.  Just drinking in the air that goes on forever reminded me to breathe.  My lungs filled up and I felt myself expanding to meet the living openness. 

Here I was invited to take up more room.

I realized that most of my life I’ve been trying to grow smaller and take up less space.  I’ve shrunk my body, my mind and my voice.  I was so proud of being a low maintenance daughter/friend/wife that I’ve hurt other people by not filling the space in their lives they opened for me.

And I realized, I need to grow!  I don’t have to step on other people’s toes to dance, although in the learning process I most likely will. 

I’ve started by asking for that extra tube ride and extra scoop of ice cream.  I will eat until I’m satisfied and not stop hungry because I am afraid someone else wants to save that food for later.  I will talk to my friends and invite myself over.

I will not be ashamed to have needs and will have the courage to acknowledge them.

I want to be like the prairie skies- large and alive with the power to invite others to breathe and take up their own space.

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